|Horace Grant sporting his Google Goggles|
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA - (@The Comedy News) - Former NBA star Horace Grant is the new spokesman for Google's latest invasion of user privacy---the Google Goggles.
"As the world's most famous wearer of oversize novelty glasses, I think Google Goggles are a slam dunk!" Grant announced as part of Google's advertising campaign. "Now, with Google Goggles, you can look like a 4-time champion! Who needs privacy when you have the eyes of a champion?"
Nicknamed 'Project Glass', Google expects its revolutionary goggles to invade users privacy more than ever.
Google's business model seems to do more than just invade peoples lives with still-photos and video footage. Google hopes that the Goggles can literally see the unique view that users have only recorded in the privacy of their own minds.
"De-privatize your brain. Share your secrets. Google Googles." ---Horace Grant
The newest television advertisement for the Google Goggles begins over a black screen to the sounds of 'Sirius' by the Alan Parsons Project":
Google expects the Goggles to fail and be discontinued by December of 2012."Horace Grant. True Patriot. Born on the Fourth of July [in 1965]. Don't you wanna SEE like HORACE? Try the Google Goggles. You may not score very much or at all, but it will definitely give you the ASSIST you need in life."